So you’re telling me you’ve never taken something from the staff fridge that wasn’t yours? Yea right! You can put away that halo and get rid of those puppy dog eyes because we’re on to you.
Here are just a few other things that all workers do but will never admit to.
Looking up jobs online
Listen, we’re all adults. We know that employees (even happy employees) will check out job ads online. And so they should. It’s good to know what options are out there. Just don’t print out an application on the work printer (yes, I’ve actually made this mistake before).
Secretly researching holidays you’ll probably never take
Nothing kills the Tuesday afternoon blues quite like picturing yourself on a beach in Bora Bora with a cocktail in one hand and a good book in the other. We’ve all had a quick Skyscanner search on particularly crappy days. Go on, admit it.
Signing a birthday card with no idea who it is for
Who the hell is Greg? Does anyone know? Is he in accounts? You’ll never know who Greg is. Just write ”Happy Birthday” and pass it along.
Fantasising about your passion project
Everyone has one. Maybe you see yourself starting your own fashion company or running a pastry shop in the south of France. Dreaming about it can take the edge of a long work week.
Staying five minutes late so you don’t get stuck in a lift with your arch nemesis
Ugh! You really can’t face another mind-numbing conversation with Susan from sales. It’s much better to wait until she leaves before you make your move.
Hello January sales, goodbye wages. The temptation to find a perfect outfit for Saturday night will usually strike sometime after lunch when your mind is firmly on the pub, not your latest work project.
Spending 80% of your time Googling
What’s the right email salutation for your boss? How do you spell committee? Where is the nearest Mexican restaurant? Your secret browser history consists of banal everyday questions that you should probably already know the answer to.
We’ve all been there. You come into work with a clear idea of what you would like to achieve that day. However, ten minutes in and five emails later and you’re already in a complete flap. On the outside, you’re cool as a cucumber but on the inside, you’re screaming ”Help me!”.