Congratulations, you’ve endured the hardships of college and come out the other side. Finally, you can reap the rewards of your 3/4 year slog. Those late night cramming sessions, the farcical student housing, the balancing of study and a part time job – and all on a diet of cereal! Now the poverty, the malnourishment and the cheap vodka can all be put behind you as you are catapulted like a cannonball of success into the real world… Or not. Here’s 6 graduation expectations vs. their harrowing realities.
Expectation: The job offers will be rolling in now that you’re qualified. You may have to invest in a large stick for batting away headhunters.
Reality: It’s a struggle to even get a rejection reply from companies. You’ve exhausted all avenues and are yet to be called for an interview.
Expectation: I’m prepared for my new career: brimming with knowledge and highly impressive. Let the wonderful adventure commence.
Reality: You have no idea what you’re doing and begin to doubt whether you actually went to college at all.
Expectation: Farewell poverty. The scrimping and saving of your college years are gone. No more paying for the bus in 5cents from now on it will be dining out and taxis.
Reality: I earned more in my part time job in college than I do in my post-college employment. You’re just as broke and doubly tired.
Expectation: Having graduated, your clothes will be reflective of your transformation from scruffy student to sophisticated young professional. Gone are the staple skinny jeans and out come the blazers and patent shoes.
Reality: You’re wearing odd socks and trainers with holes in them. Nobody has commented on how snazzy and well turned out you are. You consider scrawling ‘I work in an office’ on your forehead so that people will engage you in a conversation about your new role.
Expectation: Not only do you become a graduate upon leaving college but you also become a fully fledged grown up. It occurs as a fluid process akin to osmosis. The parts of your life begin to slot together like a wonderfully mature jigsaw.
Reality: You have no idea how to read the gas meter or what the tog value of a quilt is. You long for the company of your like-minded, clueless college friends.
Expectation: Your social calendar will be jam packed with hot parties and sophisticated weekend city breaks.
Reality: You can’t afford your Netflix this month so you stay at home watching reruns of Gilmore Girls and eating digestive biscuits.
So what’s a grad to do?
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